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The magician knew just what to do. He brought her down an aisle, found a section marked "birthday," and said: "Pick a card, any card". The Russian magician, in 1932, found an amazing new piece for his act: a giant, wooden sarcophagus in the shape of a beautiful woman. The piece had giant, metal blades inside at waist level.
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Share them with your friends and family, and try your best to mediate the laughter levels. We all know that feeling when the short jokes hit so hard we can't stop laughing, and our stomachs would rather go on a vacation than continue. Don't forget to vote for your favorites, and happy laughing! #1.
Man starts to tell a blonde joke in a bar full of girls. Then this
14. What's a cat's favorite dessert? A bowl full of mice-cream. 15. Where did the music teacher leave her keys? In the piano! 16. What did the policeman say to his hungry stomach? "Freeze.
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All bottled up. "We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle, and if the bottle pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a.
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Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have their shoes. Two men meet on opposite sides of a river. One shouts to the other, "I need you to help me get to the other side!" The other guy replies, "You're on the other side!"
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This joke may contain profanity. ๐ค. I am over 18. I made a list of my favorite anti-jokes. The first 10 are great but the last one is fucking gold. 01) great. 02) great. 03) great. 04) great. 05) great.
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The To Do List: The To Do List is a 2013 American romantic comedy film written and directed by Maggie Carey in her feature film directorial debut, starring Aubrey Plaza. Microsoft To Do: removing the hyphen from To-Do. "Your Preview of Microsoft To-Do". www.wunderlist.com. Retrieved 2018-12-19.
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With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on.
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The NCAA's investigation into the sign-stealing scandal remains ongoing, as are the jokes, and especially now that Michigan is college football's 2023-24 national champion.
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Top 55 Long Jokes: The Talking Parrot: A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of this, the man finally gets fed up and throws the parrot into the freezer to teach it a lesson.
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Humor has certainly evolved over the years, yet many jokes manage to withstand the test of time. To commemorate the 100th anniversary of Reader's Digest, our team of humor-loving editors combed the archives to come up with this collection of the 100 best jokes published in the magazine since 1922.In fact, we couldn't stop ourselves, so you'll actually find more than 100.
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From the best clean jokes for adults to funny clean jokes of the day, this big SFW list has something hilarious for everyone: kids, teens, seniors and co-workers.
20 jokes that are so stupid they are actually funny Wititudes
The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!". The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!". The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.". I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach.
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Holiday Jokes. Halloween Kid Jokes - Perfect for lunch boxes, print these for free! Christmas jokes - Another set of hilarious jokes to print. Elf Jokes - Printable cards are perfect if you have an elf on the shelf - they are funny even if you don't) St Patrick's Day Jokes. Easter Jokes.
15 Best Printable Halloween Bookmarks Jokes PDF for Free at Printablee
Death: Jack! Your time is up. I'll take you now. Jack: Not today please, I have a lot more to do. Death: Oh no, you're the first on the list to die. Jack: Alright, I'll finish what I'm doing first. Even better, I'll make you some coffee while you wait. And after I'm done, we can leave.
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Body like a Greek statue - completely pale, no arms.". - Phil Wang. "If God had written the Bible, the first line should have been 'It's round.'". - Eddie Izzard. "I bought.